STRIPES (Svetlana Shkolnikova) - Senators propose abolishing the Selective Service | Stars and Stripes
The senators say the system is costly and a relic, operating with a budget of $31 million to prepare for a draft that has not occurred since 1973.
BABYLONBEE (Babylon Bee) - Patriots Draft Marriage Counselor In Second Round
PITTSBURGH, PA — With their second-round pick in the 2026 NFL Draft, the New England Patriots have officially selected marriage counselor Amy Connors out of the University of North Texas Clinical Counseling Program.
| Keywords | patriotsnfldraftmarriage-counselornew-england-patriotssportssatirenfl-draftamy-connorsfootballpittsburghpennsylvaniaunfunnyhumorcomedy |
NEWSNATIONNOW (Addy Bink) - Who has to register for Selective Service, and are there exceptions?
Automatic registration is expected to begin later this year - but are there exceptions?
| Keywords | selective-serviceregistrationus-armymilitarydraftconscriptiongovernmentusadepartment-of-defensedodenlisted-soldiersfederal-lawlegallaws |