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WORLD — Reports from across the globe this morning indicated that mankind was officially all out of passwords.
| Keywords | satirebabylon-beehumorparodyinternet-culturetechtechnologypasswordsabsurdity |
‘Extreme leftwing bias’
CNN featured a statement about Republican Kentucky Sen. Mitch McConnell from a parody X account, apparently believing it was made by a real congressman. Wednesday’s episode of “CNN This Morning” displayed the satirical account’s quote side by side with similar comments about McConnell’s current health situation from spokespersons for Senate Majority Leader John Thune, Majority Whip John Barrasso and conservative commentator Scott Jennings. “I spoke to my old friend Mitch McConnell this morning, the senior Senator from Kentucky. He’s still recovering in the hospital. We talked for just shy of 45 minutes,” read Kimble’s Tuesday X post — which CNN featured on the Wednesday morning segment. Host Audie Cornish appeared to…Open
BIRMINGHAM, AL — Local man Brett Callahan informed his wife that he wouldn't be able to mow the lawn today as he was completely tied up playing a lawn-mowing simulator.
U.S. — The White House confirmed on Friday what many had long suspected: that podcast host Candace Owens is an elaborate Jewish plot to make antisemites look retarded.
| Keywords | satirebabylon-beecandace-owenspoliticshumorparodysocial-commentaryreligionjewish-culturewhite-houseinternet-culturemedia-biasideologycontroversycommentaryuspodcastsocial-justice |
BUENOS AIRES — American politician Graham Platner suspended his race for the U.S. Senate this week amid allegations of sexual assault and Nazism, and reportedly fled to Argentina.
| Keywords | graham-platnerargentinasenateusapoliticsscandalsexual-assaultnazismbuenos-airesu-s-senatedemocratsgopcorruptionelectionpolitical-discoursesatirecomedyparodybabylon-bee |
'we should not have done that'
| Keywords | cnnaudie-cornishmitch-mcconnellmediaparodyfake-newsjournalismmistakepoliticsbreaking-newsdaily-callerus-mediamisinformationrepublicangoppolitical-figures |
'Extreme leftwing bias'
| Keywords | cnnmitch-mcconnellrepublicangoppoliticsmediamainstream-mediabiasfake-newsmisinformationcomedyparodyelectionus-politicswashingtonsenatecongressextreme-leftwing-bias |
NEW YORK CITY — A screaming Sonny Hostin fled in terror after rounding the corner in the grocery store only to come face-to-face with a shelf of Pillsbury American flag cookie dough.
| Keywords | babylon-beesonny-hostinpillsburyamerican-flagusasatirehumorpoliticsentertainmentgrocery-storecookie-doughabsurdistsocial-commentaryculturefunnyparodymsnbc |
ORLANDO, FL — After years of being admired for his absolutely shredded physique, local man Chris Kolaski finally revealed that his secret to looking like a Greek god was water aerobics.
| Keywords | satireparodyhumorfunnybabylon-beeabsurditywellnessfitnessbodybuildingworkoutwater-aerobicsorlandofloridachris-kolaskiman-vs-naturelife-skillshealthshreddedgreek-god |
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a narrow 5-4 decision, the United States Supreme Court ruled today that any baby born in or within five yards of an Olive Garden restaurant is an Italian citizen.
| Keywords | satirepoliticscomedysupreme-courtwashington-dcentertainmenthumorscotususculture-warlegalgovernmentidentity-politicsparodytrump |